You Are Now A Dodge Charger SRT Hellcat Speeding Down The ‘Twisted Sisters’ Loop In Texas

You woke up this morning after a long night of reading Kafka and something felt different. Were your hands and feet always treaded like this? And you’re so gassy, like 93 octane gassy. You try to call out for your partner to help you, but all that comes out is the 707-horsepower growl of a Hellcat engine. It’s your…